did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
