the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Randomize
