I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
