Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
