In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
