4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
