with your own penis?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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