So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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