I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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