oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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