sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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