East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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