Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He shit in the fireplace
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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