the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
