Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
