u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
