New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
