So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
