my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize