I have demons in me.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize