Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
