we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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