Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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