apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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