Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
