You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
