Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
