i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
