IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
