You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
You are the jesus of drinking
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
