It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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