check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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