Me. At least after what I've been through.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
