I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
