More tranny stories later!
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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