see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
