I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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