i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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