I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
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