I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i wish my penis had a tongue
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize