It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
if only i could text you this smell
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
