i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
