Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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