He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
