if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
