actually, I'm a sock model
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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