pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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