he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
