Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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