So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize