i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
